at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
