we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
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