fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
