I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
Can i not drive my cunt home
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
