Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize