found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Randomize
