so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
