i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
