Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Randomize
