Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize
