ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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