Pregnant stripper...not hot.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
