At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize