Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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