I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
