I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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