Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Randomize
