The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Randomize
