This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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