already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
