So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Randomize