PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
