xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
