I wanna passion pit in your ass
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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