my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
i would one night stand the shit outta him
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
