We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
