I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
