He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I'm passing your future prison.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize
