am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
