after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
No I am not eating basil off your cock
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
