I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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