You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
