Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
my liver is dry heaving
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
