your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize