It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize
