Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
