Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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