I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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