How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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