there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Randomize
