Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Randomize
