I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
