it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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