Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I have already put on my inside pants.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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