he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
