I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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