True but thats because hes a fetus.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
