Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Randomize
