I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
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