Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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